March 27, 2011 – Song 143

It’s my first inclination to say…

“THIS IS A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT…WITH GUITARS”

But if I have one goal for 2011 it’s to marry my Cryptic Nature with Understanding.

So instead I will preface this with: This is hands down one of the coolest things anyone has ever told me.

Ladies and Gentlemen…May I present Claire Mooney. Song 143.

I don’t know how to begin…I feel like Alice talking to the March Hare & Mad Hatter…”begin at the beginning” 

In February, the 3rd week, just before my birthday, my car was stolen from the driveway outside my apartment. Its a 1989 Subaru Loyale. My wonderful friend Jill brought me to North Carolina to her friend Ash’s farm, where she paid for it and we drove it home to Chicago. I love this beast of car…but one day, after a very, very cold night, I look outside and she is gone.

I tend to not freak out over such things since nothing can be done about it. Police were called, Facebook was notified and I decided I had to sit and wait until perhaps the goat got a ticket which would lead us to where she was parked. This meant I have to wait for street cleaning which doesn’t begin until April 1…now, so, again, I didn’t freak out, I have maintained ‘it will all work out’. My friends and family have been much more concerned about how on earth am I going to get around (for those that don’t know, me having a car is a bit of a necessity.) One friend asked if he could put together a benefit show, my Dad has, I’m sure, been trying to find good cheap reliable cars online, etc etc…but I keep saying ‘it will work out, I don’t know how, but it will.’ (I mean, it always does, even if not in the planned and anticipated way.)

Last week I had this Facebook conversation(s) with my Sarah Frier…

she posted this to my wall…

A Canadian man named William Treble once found over a thousand four-leaf clovers in a single day. Niamh Bond, a British baby, was born on the tenth day of the tenth month of 2010 — at exactly 10:10 a.m. and 10 seconds. My friend Allan told me he was driving in suburbia the other day when two white cats bolted across the road right in front of him. And yet as lucky as all that might sound, it pales in comparison to the good fortune that’s headed your way, Pisces. Unlike their luck, which was flashy but ultimately meaningless, yours will be down-to-earth and have practical value.

To which I reply:

I wonder if a couple tickets to Mexico could be considered practical. Me thinks yes.

I also made another comment that perhaps when said car is found there will be a bag of money shoved under the seat that the thieves left behind and we can get a villa on the coast for a spell.

Now. I don’t believe in coincidence, happenstance or mistakes. I do believe in surprises though.

My toilet keeps getting clogged. Like for a month now. Every time I poop I have to say a little prayer that it flushes. Its been pissing me off…and sure enough this morning, it won’t drain fully. So I take a coat hanger and start jabbing away whilst cursing. I flush. It clears. Except there is something at the bottom of the bowl…

Surprise!

There is a huge gold and diamond ring sitting at the bottom of my toilet bowl. What? I didn’t eat that. This is for a large man, it slides right off my thumb as if I were a 5 year old trying on my Mom’s wedding ring. I immediately thought of Frodo holding that ring that was just so big for his tiny hobbit hand.

So. This ring. I can only assume that it was the crazy old Ukrainian that lived here before me who took in stray animals and had a mail order bride. They fought a lot. She maybe flushed it and it got lodged? I don’t know. It was a hiding spot for his special things? I guess I should start pooping more. Maybe more treasure will come up.

My dad is taking it to his jeweler to check it out. Maybe it’s nothing. Maybe it’s fake. Or maybe its a huge fucking diamond and the reason I didn’t worry was because. somehow, I get that I shouldn’t..that it will all come out in the wash…or the toilet.

-xo c

•••••••

I told Claire I would add anything she missed but I don’t really know what she was so worried about. This is perfection. If I can add only one thing it’s that I took to calling her car the “Pvolvo”. Because I am a funny lady who knows a lot about music and nothing about cars.

“Begin at the beginning and go on till you come to the end.”

Claire Mooney has that tattooed on her leg. In a place only the very lucky will ever get to see. Hubba Hubba. ♥

Just so we’re square, I already had a post written. And you better believe it involves Macaulay Culkin. Because that is exactly how you do that.

Also Moondog, it’s hard to imagine it’s possible that there is anyone on this whole earth who was as tickled by your LOTR reference more than I. And I also liked how you called me “your Sarah Frier”.

And triple also, if you feel like I am not acknowledging something, just be patient. I’m workin’ on my words. I love you and I have all kinds of calendars in mind. This train is rolling until early November. Some people have left. And some haven’t gotten here yet. ♥ And I, for one, can not wait to meet them. All of them.

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