January 10, 2011 – Song 67b

So on the day that the wave Emily was riding turned into The Humunga Cowabunga From Down Unda she just so happened to be visiting friends in New York. And they took her out, like good friends do, with the intention of filling her with something a tad stronger than saltwater. If it’s brown, drink it down, it might be whiskey, as they say. So through a random chain of events Emily was walking through the bar, which had been explained to me as “not the sort of place you would think this would happen” when she ran into a friend who was randomly sitting next to a certain famous person who I will only refer to from here on out as “Stephanie”. I might be really giving it away here but Emily has since described Stephanie’s outfit as “a swimsuit”. Circle takes the square, I’d say. 

Anywho, Emily’s friend stops her to check in and once again tell her how sorry he is and to remind Emily that she will in fact be ok. Upon hearing this exchange Stephanie asks what happened. And Emily says something vague and assumes that Stephanie is only intending to be polite. But Stephanie says “Listen. People kiss my ass all day. Now sit down and tell me just what happened.” And so Emily does. And Stephanie listens offering kindness and saying things like “What a bitch!” in all the right places. Like good friends do.

So the moral of the story is that by simply being a Ladydude Stephanie forever changed what could have effectively been one of the worst days of Emily’s life into what no doubt, will instead be one of the weirdest waves ever. And when I say weird, I mean that in the best possible way.

Damn, I was downright determined not to like your ass. Song 67b.

EMILY’S P.S. – It went down at a bar on the Lower Easy Side called Welcome to the Johnson’s on the same day she flipped people off at the Mets game and was promptly whisked away to Seinfeld’s private box. What a dame.

SARAH’S P.S. – Man I hope you meant to type the Lower “Easy” Side.